Well, today is day 1, the break is over. I made my ultrasound appointment for next Monday, which works since I don't work that day. My hope is that they want to do the IUI on Thursday so that I don't have to call off work, since Thurs is the only day that I don't work after the ultrasound and before we go out of town for my parent's party. I really really really hope this cycle works. I've stopped some of my arthritis medications, and I'm not going to drink ANY coffee during this cycle, and hopefully it works. This is the last clomid cycle. DH and I have agreed that next cycle we will do the injectibles. This is scary on many levels. 1st, because it's a new medicine and has a higher incidence of multiples, 2nd, because it is one more step towards IVF, which is one step closer to the end of the line. I'm still so scared that we'll get to IVF and try it, and have it not work, and be told that I've reached the end of the line and still can't have babies. I'm scared of adoption, not because I feel like I'll be giving up having genetic children, but because adoption seems so much more uncertain. I mean, if you get pregnant and have a baby, nobody can take it away from you (unless you do something awful), but if you adopt, there is always the potential for a mother to change her mind and take the baby back. Maybe I watch TV too much, maybe I'm over analyzing, but I'm scared.
So, I'll just keep worrying, and obsessing, and hoping that this cycle works!!
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